


Through the Corridors.

by Dramaticirony



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Additions to Canon, Angst, Catra (She-Ra) Redemption, Catra's mental shift to redemption, Character Study, F/F, Glimmer yells at Catra, Mental Health Issues, Mentions of past abuse, but enough that I put it in the tags, glimmer and catra friendship, glitra friendship, not heavily catradora
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-30
Updated: 2020-12-30
Packaged: 2021-03-11 04:41:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,330
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28419282
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dramaticirony/pseuds/Dramaticirony
Summary: Catra's time on Horde Prime's ship had more self-reflection than she cared to admit. Maybe it's because a certain annoying Queen keeps making her question things. Maybe it's because she's finally realizing an old friend truly loved her and everything she did up until this point led her to nothing but pain.Going through those dark corridors just might help her to find her way back to Adora again. Just like when they were kids.Basically, this is an analysis of what Catra was going through mentally from s5 ep 1-3.
Relationships: Adora/Catra (She-Ra), Catra & Glimmer (She-Ra)
Comments: 17
Kudos: 39





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone! So I love She Ra and have become more interested in a certain lesbian catgirl more than I thought I would be.  
> I was always interested in Catra's mental state during these few episodes and what directly led her to change. I also always wanted Glimmer to mention Angella at some point, so I decided to add some stuff to canon between them. This was supposed to be a one-shot and wound up being 3 chapters. Oops.

She doesn’t know why she spies on Glimmer in her prison the first time during her first few days on Prime’s ship. If she had to label it, probably morbid curiosity. It’s not like she talks to her, though. But the second time she journeys down that dark corridor to the prison cells, she interacts with her.

With a smirk on her face and the knowledge that Horde Prime wants her to be part of his army, Catra is bold and taps on the green force field that keeps Glimmer trapped inside.

“Oh, great- you,” Glimmer sneers when she sees Catra on the other side.

Catra simply chuckles and taps the force field with a clawed finger. “Pretty fancy accommodations, huh? Well, for a prisoner, that is.” She pauses before asking in a mocking tone, “How’s it going, _princess_?” And she means that compliment too, this cell in Horde Prime’s ship is furnished and nicer than even the Force Captain solo room back in the Fright Zone.

As expected Glimmer reacts, scoffing and shooting back at her, “Don’t pretend like _you’re_ any better off than I am right now. You may be on the other side of this force field, but you’re as alone as I am.”

Smirk faltering a bit, Catra surmises, “The Horde’s the Horde, even in space. As long as I’m of value to Horde Prime, I’ve got a place in this world. I can work my way up here, just like I did before.”

Instead of showing fear or anger, Catra is surprised when Glimmer laughs. “Is that really what you want? We both saw what happened to Hordak. Do you really think you can come out on top here?”

Of course, Catra remembered, but she didn’t expect someone like Glimmer to understand. She had nothing else- no other path to take. “Hordak played all of his cards wrong; I won’t make that mistake.”

“Looks to me like you did too back at the Horde, or why was everything destroyed like you and Hordak had a fight to the death?”

Catra is about to give a biting comment to that when two of Prime’s freakish green-eyed clones announce that she and Glimmer were invited to dinner with Horde Prime that evening.

When the clones let Glimmer out of her prison, the two young women look at each other with the commonality of being equally confused. 

* * *

Their next commonality happens over Prime’s dinner. A screen that the overlord produces shows them the princesses fighting for their lives back on Etheria from Horde Prime’s robots, pain and chaos reigning. Catra should smile at it, after all, she caused enough pain and destruction to Etheria herself, but it makes her feel hollow to see now.

“Why are you showing us this?” Glimmer demands with tears in her eyes.

Prime smiles. “Every rebellion forms around a leader, a beacon of hope, that little node of discord.” The screen highlights a panting Adora trying her best to fight off a robot with a battle baton. She’s in her classic red Horde jacket and not an eight-foot-tall warrior this time. “Ah, here she is! your beacon of hope. Adora. She-Ra. A nuisance that must be purged in order to bring peace to Etheria.”

Catra can’t help but suck in her breath at the sight of Adora, digging her claws in slightly to the dinner table. _Keep it together, Catra. Adora is meaningless to you. She hates you and you hate her back! Wait… Why aren’t you transforming into She-Ra, moron? You’re Adora, you can fight back better than this!_

And she can’t help but let out a small sigh of relief when Glimmer begs Prime to stop the attack on Adora and he agrees, with the leverage that Glimmer will tell him how to use the Heart of Etheria. With the leverage that he needs She Ra alive to make it work. It’s a plan Catra doubts Glimmer will make good on easily.

After the dinner, when Catra gloats to her knew leader that his form of manipulation was up to her approval he doesn’t take the flattery. She’s now the one under the microscope of Prime’s gaze and taunting smirk.

“Elevated heart rate, dilated pupils. Adora means something to you.” The way he says it, her mouth goes dry. It's as if he can see into her mind and all the precious memories that Catra herself has tried to make her forget, all the conflicted feelings and destruction she’s caused, all that Adora meant to her. 

“No, she doesn’t. She chose her side, I chose mine. She means _nothing_ to me.” She can’t quite look Prime directly in the eye as she says it, her voice wavering and the conviction she used to have gone.

“You Etherians are all alike. Such strong connections to one another.” Horde Prime moves in closer to her at the side of the dinner table and with a large, white-clawed finger, grazes the side of Catra’s cheek. Just like Shadow Weaver used to do. “These connections make you weak,” he whispers to Catra.

And Catra knows this, how could she not? But that’s not what she needs to focus on right now. “What are you going to do with me?” she asks.

And Prime makes it clear her original plan is not going to work. Her so-called “little ploy of parsing out information like a bargaining chip” wouldn’t work.

He sees all and he knows all.

Even when he ensures Catra could still be of use to him somehow, it makes her stomach inwardly turn. There’s nothing familiar that she knows here, nothing she can wrap her head around.

Except…

* * *

“Hey! I know you’re watching me!” Glimmer yells, banging against the force field that now is not clear enough to show her who’s on the other side.

This game of going back to Glimmer and hiding apparently wouldn’t end, no until one of Prime’s clones interrupts and gives away her presence. He berates her for not following Prime’s orders to leave Glimmer alone.

“Little sister, why do you rebel against my commands?” Oh, now it’s the head honcho himself, taking over one of his subjects. Catra will never get used to that. “Prime sees all little sister; do not disturb the queen.”

Catra then watches as the clone Prime was taking over releases Glimmer from her cell. Taking her to visit his main vessel for a chat somewhere.

She can only watch as Glimmer is lead down a dark corridor away from her.

It doesn’t matter what happens to her; it shouldn’t _matter_. That bitch was her enemy and a thorn in her side for long enough.

But, the way she looks back at Catra as she’s being led away, with those lingering eyes, makes Catra feel shame. Those same eyes that saw her at her lowest and wouldn’t kill Catra even when she asked for it, filled with pity. Glimmer now looks at her as if she were the Queen’s only friend.

 _What the hell am I supposed to that with that?_ Catra wonders.

And she’s left in those dark, unfamiliar corridors of Prime’s ship, all alone again.


	2. Chapter 2

There’s nothing worse than the solitude of the room Prime gives her, Catra thinks. In fact, the sterile walls and bright lights of this damn ship invade her senses. The cleanliness is in direct contrast to the dark and smog-filled world of the Fright Zone that she knew and grew up with. It’s quiet and doesn’t have the same stink, but maybe that’s what makes it worse. Horde Prime’s world has nothing to it but his suffocating light.

In all the weeks she’s been on this ship now, there’s only one place in the dark she can find familiar comfort, only one place where someone truly knows her.

And so, she finds herself back at Glimmer’s cell after a few days of boredom. The Brightmoon Queen is quick to yell at her at first and Catra can’t blame her. When Glimmer throws her dinner tray at the force field cage, Catra turns away.

_I should’ve known there would be no reason to come here, what did I expect would happen? -_

“Wait!” Glimmer’s voice interrupts Catra’s exit. “I’m sorry, can- can you stay?” Glimmer’s expression shows that she’s as shocked by Catra that she makes the request.

Catra faced her back to the force field, away from Glimmer but still listening. Glimmer sits with her back to Catra as well.

There’s a moment of pause before Catra asks, “What do you want to talk about?”

“Oh I don’t know, how’s that whole ‘getting in good with Horde Prime’ thing working out for you?”

“About as well as keeping your cool around Prime is going for you, I’ll bet. How’s that going for you, by the way?”

Glimmer slams a hand against the force field, causing Catra to flinch and face her. “Hey Sparkles, I’m the one doing you a favor here. So quit it with the-”

“I just don’t understand why you want to help him!” Glimmer shouts, “He wants to destroy Etheria, pulverize it. Etheria is still your home even if you tried to burn all of it. Then again, what should I expect from you?”

Catra grimaces at that. “Oh, you want to talk about mistakes? Who’s the one who activated the Heart of Etheria in the first place and gave him our location?”

“Who’s the one who let him know we even existed by setting off a portal that almost destroyed the planet? Oh right, that was _you!_ ”

Catra stands up, suddenly on the defensive, a scowl on her face. “Adora fixed that like she fixes everything. Get over-”

“Adora couldn’t fix everything that day!” Glimmer yells, rising as well. Catra thought she had seen the young royal angry before, but she had gone from calm to seething. “Do you know how Adora _fixed_ your screw up? By letting my mother close the portal. She’s stuck in a void of time and space that we can’t get to because of what you did!”

Catra’s scowl is wiped away clean with that confession. No wonder Sparkles had left her for dead during that one fight. She had guessed somehow the Horde was responsible for Queen Angella’s death, but she hadn’t known the specifics. And if she were honest, she didn’t care at the time. Another blow to the princesses was fine with her. But now…

No. She couldn’t allow herself to feel any sentiment. But looking at Glimmer, who was panting a bit and looking as if she were on the verge of tears, Catra couldn’t stay quiet.

“How long have you been holding that one in, Sparkles?” she asked, no malice in her voice and Glimmer could’ve sworn, a little sympathy.

“For a long time, I even blamed Adora for it.”

“When you should’ve been blaming me.”

“Yes! And now Prime tells me my Dad is alive, and he wants me to give Adora to him! Power in exchange for one of my best friends! How could he even think I would consider that?”

“That’s quite the dilemma.”

“It’s something you would do,” Glimmer says with gritted teeth, and Catra bristles at that.

Catra knows she has no place to say she’s above hurting Adora, but if they were still friends, if she hadn’t left her…Catra didn’t betray her friends.

 _That’s a laugh. Think of what you did to both Scorpia and Entrapta who were nothing but loyal to you._ The voice in her mind sounds suspiciously like Shadow Weaver, it always does.

Something in Catra’s face must’ve shown her discomfort, because Glimmer sits back down again, facing away from Catra, and sounds as if she’s crying.

Catra shapes herself up and awkwardly says, I’ll try and get you more food, since you smashed that meal all over the floor, and leaves.

When she returns to Glimmer, she points out she isn’t eating when she’s given her food.

Ignoring her question, Glimmer asks, “Are you even going to even try to apologize?”

Catra is taken back by this. “For what specifically?” but Catra figures Angella is on her mind. So she sits on the floor, this time facing Glimmer, who is watching her attentively. “What good would an apology do? It’s not like it’ll bring your Mom back, or the towns I’ve destroyed, or the friends I’ve hurt.”

“So you _have_ thought about it,” Glimmer says, a bit surprised. Catra doesn’t answer that. Glimmer sighs. “The woman I saw before Prime captured us, she was on the edge. I know that couldn’t have happened if you felt nothing. Maybe it was just a breakdown, but I’d like to believe you have a conscious somewhere in there.”

Glimmer wasn’t wrong- Catra had wanted to die that day, and she had been feeling the gnawing of what was probably guilt in her stomach ever since she opened that portal, but she had no right to know anything about that.

“What do you know about me?” Catra asks accusingly. She stands up and Glimmer follows suit.

“I know Adora must’ve been your friend at one time for some reason.” Again, Catra feels floored by Glimmer’s words. “And apologies aren’t useless by the way, not if you mean them. I want to apologize to Adora and Bow if I ever get to see them again.” There’s more silence before Glimmer asks, “Didn’t you ever want to apologize to Adora? Knowing you, there must’ve been tons of stuff you did wrong as a kid.”

Catra grunts and rolls her eyes. “Eat your dinner Sparkles, I’ll see you some other time.”

And she leaves a confused Glimmer to herself.

* * *

_“Catra, come out! I know you didn’t mean to hit Lonnie! You just gotta say you’re sorry!”_

The words from when Adora and she were kids rang in her ears now as she lay in the bed Prime provided for her. The scuffle had been pointless; Adora would never have abandoned her for Lonnie. But it had looked that way. Catra couldn’t help but imagine Adora’s love for her growing smaller and smaller as she filled up her heart with love for other cadets. Love was finite, if Shadow Weaver had taught her anything, it was that love was always in danger of going away if one wasn’t good enough. And Catra was _never_ good enough.

So, she had responded to Adora as a child by scratching her face and later jumping roughly on her stomach, proclaiming _: “I’ll never say sorry, to anybody, ever!”_

Knowing she wouldn’t be able to sleep again that night, Catra took to staring out a window on Prime’s ship. Watching Etheria down below was all she could do. An Etheria that Prime was causing discord to and attempting to purge.

The red glow from the ships in Prime’s fleet that were attacking the planet now caused her confusion. What must have been going on down there unsettled her. Why though? Etheria had never meant anything to her. It was a world that rejected her constantly, so she rejected it right back. Why did the harsh reality that she knew going away seem so horrible when that she was what she wanted when she set off the portal?

Double Trouble’s voice enters her mind as she thinks of the fate of her home planet.

_“It’s for your own good, darling. We both know this was never what you really wanted.”_

Then what _did_ she really want? Ugh, that didn’t matter. _Shadow Weaver was right; I’m no good to anyone._

Thinking of her old enemy, Catra longed to visit her again in a strange way. To be covered by the dark of the prison corridor instead of the light of everything else on the ship, the proof of everything she’d been doing wrong staring at her outside a window.

With her feline speed, she was able to get close to her destination in a flash, avoiding two prying clones by running away from them.

She was finally nearing Glimmer’s cell when another clone blocked her way.

“This part of the ship is off-limits to you, Catra” the clone recited in a monotone voice.

Oh, now Prime was going to make a big deal about where she went on the ship? Of all the-wait a minute.

“You called me Catra, none of the other clones do that. You remember me, don’t you?” She looked in those soulless green eyes, trying to see her old commander in them. “Here’s a clue, you don’t like me. Hordak.” It had to be him.

“It is wrong to have a name” the clone responded, a slight wavering there. Feeling.

“Fine, the name thing can be our secret, it’s just- nice to see a familiar face.” Gods, to think the last time she saw him they were trying to kill each other. Not that she didn’t have what was coming to her.

Horde Prime’s words come into her mind. “ _It seems he had very little love for you at the end.”_

The clone looks as if he is about to respond before stating in a monotone voice again, “This part of the ship is off-limits to you, little sister.”

Catra sighs, “Yeah, yeah, got it.” She walked away, planning to wait until no clones were around the prisoner to pay another visit.

* * *

When Catra finally gets to see Glimmer alone again two days later, the young queen is throwing the furniture from her cell at the force field. Catra can’t quite see it but can hear the struggle.

“Hey, there princess, how’s the escape attempt going?” Catra announces herself, deactivating the blurred setting of the force field so the two can see each other.

Glimmer scoffed and crossed her arms over her chest. “You again. Why do you keep coming back here?”

Catra shrugged, “Just bored, I guess.” A lie, but she hopes it’s convincing.

Glimmer goes to sit on her bed. “No, I mean, Horde Prime, told you not to talk to me. He’s gonna catch you eventually. Why risk it?”

_Good question, Sparkles._

Glimmer’s face turned into a slight smile. “You’re lonely, aren’t you?”

 _Oh, the nerve of her!_ – “What do you know? You’re the prisoner here, I can go where I want. So stay here by yourself for all I care” Catra sneers, claws clenched.

When she tries to leave, Glimmer encourages her to come back. “Okay! You’re right, it helps having someone to talk to. Even if you’re the last person I’d ever want to be stuck here with.”

Catra chuckles at that. “Trust me, Sparkles, the feeling is mutual. Also, I doubt Prime is watching us every second, even if _Prime knows all!”_ Catra tries to do her best impersonation of him and Glimmer laughs.

The two then resume their positions of sitting down, back to back against the force field.

“I guess because you’re talking to me, everything is okay now or something?” Catra asks.

Glimmer grunts in response. “The things you did will never exactly be _okay_ Catra, but I want to keep the conversation light. I need that right now.”

Silence.

Not able to think of anything else to say, Catra asks, “So, what would you be doing if you were back on Etheria right now, and you know, a prisoner on an alien ship?”

Glimmer perks up at that, “Well probably teleporting around Etheria and visiting the other princesses. But if it were a really perfect day, Bow, Adora, and I would be having a sleepover.” She giggles as she says this. “We’d raid Brightmoon’s kitchen for cake and then we’d eat it with our hands right off the platter.”

It sounds so cheesy, so unlike anything Catra has ever known, so… _princessy_ that she’s almost surprised when she realizes there’s a part she can relate to.

“We used to have those,” Catra speaks up softly.

“What?’

“Sleepovers,” Catra explains. “Me and Adora, when we were cadets in the Horde. We’d play tricks on Kyle, stay up all night, whispering about…you know, whatever.” She’s almost wistful as she says it, hugging her knees to her chest and hoping her smile doesn’t show in her voice.

She doesn’t see Glimmer smile at this confession, but hears it when she excitedly asks, “Did Adora still thrash around all night, and like sleep fight? What was that about?”

Catra laughs with Glimmer at that, unable to help herself. “She _always_ did that. Adora can’t even relax when she’s asleep.” As their laughter dies down, Catra surprises herself when she asks, “Any other good stories about Adora or Brightmoon?”

And suddenly she’s listening to a few stories, one about how when Adora first moved into the Brightmoon palace, she couldn’t even sleep on the fluffy beds right and ripped the one Glimmer's mattress. 

“That sounds like something she’d do alright, the idiot,” Catra says, thinking of the blonde and remembering her laugh.

“Bow and I always thought her getting used to stuff was funny, but she got the hang it of in her own way. We really worked well together,” Glimmer reminisces. Catra tries not to let that get to her.

“I just- miss them,” Glimmer continues. “I was so awful to them the last time we saw each other. I’d do anything to go back and make it right.”

 _I should want that for me and Adora,_ Catra thinks. _I always should have_ …. _no that’s stupid. Stop thinking like that._

“What about you, what would you be doing if you were back on Etheria right now?” Glimmer asks, interrupting Catra’s thoughts.

“I’d-” _What, do you think you would be able to make things up to Adora? Why would she give you another chance? When did you ever do anything but hurt her?_ “Uh, nothing. There’s nothing for me on Etheria.” Nothing besides the destroyed Fright Zone and people who hated her.

“Really? Do you…ever even think about Adora? I know things are completely different from how they used to be-”

“I think that’s enough for today, Sparkles.”

With that, Catra walks away; she can’t take thinking about Adora any longer.

* * *

That hope of being able to forget about Adora is dashed when Prime alerts her with news of an ancient ship heading their way that is undetectable by his complex machinery. Surrounded by clones in the throne room, all Catra can do is try and get out of this as soon as she can.

“I don’t know what’s going on with that ship.” Prime’s green eyes bore into her. Clearly, he thinks this is She-Ra related and assumes Catra knows anything about what her former friend is up to.

“I don’t!” Catra protests again. “Me and Adora, we’re not friends. I don’t know anything about her plans.” Gods even as she says it, her whiny tone and the way her arms cling to her chest show how scared she is. _Pathetic._

“And yet you seek to protect her,” Prime states, the side of him that was smirking and enjoying Catra’s discomfort gone.

Catra doesn’t confirm or deny it. She has no right to do either. All she’s done for the past three years is hurt Adora, but…how did she feel now?

“You’ve been speaking to our guest, Queen Glimmer, against my command. Have you not, sister?” Prime questions. “You have pity for her. Use this to your advantage and speak to her; learn what you can. She must have some knowledge of this mysterious ship.”

Catra shakes her head. “That won’t work. She doesn’t trust me. She’s not gonna give me anything!” The look of cool disappointment Prime gives her makes her try a different tactic.

“Believe me, if I could tell you where Adora is, I would. She’s my enemy. I want her gone!” Though she clenches her fists for effect, Catra doesn’t believe it anymore.

Prime doesn't buy it either. “Oh, look at you, poor sister,” Horde Prime tuts, “Your Adora cause s you nothing but suffering. Don’t you want to be free of it?”

 _Be free of Adora? That’s not possible. She’s-_ Catra had to admit it to herself, _she’s everywhere in my life. To forget her, it would be lovely; it would be…horrible._ The thought scares Catra almost more than anything else she’s endured.

“There is another way, Prime interrupts her thoughts. “Let me show you.”

And Catra feels what happens next is almost a blur. The tone of the green and black throne room becomes eerier as every clone pays attention and something is clearly going to happen.

The clone that must’ve been Hordak is brought forward and confesses Catra gave him a name and that Prime must take an affliction from him.

When the green pool is opened and Hordak goes in, Catra realizes this is a way Horde Prime uses his powers to gain control and “purify” his subjects.

The screaming, the boiling, the chanting- _“Cast out the shadows, cast out the shadows! All beings must suffer to become pure!” -_ Catra uses all her will not to try and run away.

When Hordak comes out, he doesn’t even have green eyes, he has white eyes. Completely devoid of individuality. Nothing on the inside but devotion to Prime.

Prime smiles and leads Hordak out of the pool by the hand. “Behold brothers, the purest among you! One to be honored.”

As the other clones yell in jubilation, Catra is face to face with Horde Prime. “Do what I ask of you,” he says simply. It is not in any way a request.

Catra knows that there’s no negotiation, no way she can get out of this one.

_Power in exchange for one of my best friends! How could he even think I would consider that?”_

_“That’s quite the dilemma.”_

_“It’s something you would do._

It certainly looked like Catra was going to be dealt with that choice, and very soon, dealing with the consequences of whatever choice she made. 


	3. Chapter 3

A few days later, the best Catra can think to do is to give Glimmer what she talked about the last time they were with each other- a cake. She makes sure it’s pink and that she is alone when she enters her cell. Probably a good idea since another piece of furniture appears to be broken in another futile escape attempt.

“Here, it’s the dumb food you wanted,” Catra displays the gift in a white box. When Glimmer eyes her with confusion, she explains further. “You know, from your perfect day or whatever.”

Glimmer now smiles. “I remember, I just- thanks.”

Catra hands her the box, agitated by her happiness. “Don’t go thinking I actually care about you. I’m supposed to talk to you. So, eat the stupid cake and then answer my questions.”

Glimmer holds the box quietly, and Catra makes sure they have privacy outside the cell. They don’t; a clone is directly outside.

“What’s going on?” Glimmer asks, clearly sensing the tension. Catra quickly sits her down on the bed, kneeling in front of her, and takes a whispering tone to speak in.

“Don’t say anything, just look at me,” she warns. “An old First One’s ship left Etheria’s atmosphere a few days ago. Prime _cannot_ track it. What do you know about it?”

Glimmer’s eyes go wide at this information and she drops the cake box on the floor. That doesn’t matter, however.

Observing her reaction, Catra’s heart races. _It’s exactly as I thought_. “Adora’s on that ship isn’t she?”

When Catra rises from her kneeling position, Glimmer is quick to grab her by the arm. “You _can’t_ tell him! You know what he’ll do to her if he catches her!”

 _I do, but it’s inevitable_. Catra yanks her arm away from Glimmer. “Adora’s on her way here. She’s coming for you!” _Always quick to place the blame on someone else, huh Catra?_ “I don’t have to do anything- I just have to let it happen.”

When she tries to turn away again, Glimmer blocks her path. “And you think Prime will reward you? As soon as you’re no longer useful to him, he’ll get rid of you in a second.”

Catra thinks of what happened to Hordak. Of how much Prime is like Shadow Weaver. “I always find a way out,” she insists to Glimmer, more to convince herself than the Queen.

Glimmer now shoves her. “So, you’ll just run away? To what? If Prime captures Adora, he can use the Heart of Etheria to wipe out the whole universe. Is that what you want?” There’s a pause. “Is that what you _still_ want? We both know that kind of destruction is a mistake that can’t be undone this time!”

Catra’s face blanches at this. Memories of that damn portal come flooding back.

_“Catra, look what’s happening! You’re going to destroy everything!”_

_“I don’t care! I won’t let you win. I’d rather see the whole world destroyed than let that happen!”_

It was happening again, and she was letting it. This time may not have been her plan, but it didn’t make it any less horrible.

Glimmer’s anger ceases and she grabs her enemy's hand. “Please Catra,” she begs, “Do one good thing in your life!”

Quick to deflect any doubts she has, Catra dismisses and leaves Glimmer alone, not any less conflicted than she was before.

* * *

“It is as our sister said. We have done a sweep of all the quadrants in our vicinity and have located the Etherian ship. It is almost here,” a clone announces to Prime in the throne room.

Prime turns to Catra. “You have done well, little sister. Soon, She-Ra will be mine. And with her, Etheria. All because of you.” Catra can’t respond, she can’t even directly look the dictator in the eyes, as she usually is unable to.

“You made the right choice,” Prime ensures her as a response to her silence. “You will be exalted, raised up above the other retched creatures of your homeworld. Is that not what you wanted?”

It used to be. Catra had that for a while back as Force Captain, and look where it got her.

" _I thought winning would be…different. Or at least, more fun. "_

She looks at the map on Prime’s screen indicating the location of Adora’s ship. “Yes, Lord Prime,” she tells him, trying to sound like one of his clones.

“Go now in peace,” he excuses her and she exits the throne room.

* * *

A million thoughts swirl in her head as she walks through the light filled corridors of the ship.

_“You try so hard to play the big, bad villain. But your heart’s never really been in it, has it?”_

_“I never wanted to leave you. You could come with me! You could join the rebellion; I know you’re not a bad person, Catra.”_

_“I know you’re not a bad person, Catra. I know you’re not a bad person, Catra. I know….”_

When she gets to towards the dark corridors that hold Glimmer’s cell, she thinks of another moment with Adora after remembering her voice.

She looks in a mirror in Prime’s ship and then sees a young Adora and Catra playing. The young Adora seems to notice her and one of the fondest things Catra ever heard from Adora echoes in her mind.

“ _I’m always gonna be your friend.”_ Adora grins at her, showing off a gap-toothed smile.

Adora’s earnest smile, that smile she knew she’d never get to see again and didn’t deserve to, but she hoped she could put on her face again, was all she could see.

Adora had promised she’d always be her friend, and Catra had never given her the benefit of the doubt when she joined in the rebellion that she still cared for her.

 _I might not be able to fix anything between us_ , Catra thinks, _but I can give something back to her for all the pain I’ve caused._

* * *

Rushing down the dark corridors, so familiar to where she and Adora would hide in the Fright Zone as kids, Catra take out a clone and retrieves Glimmer from her cell.

The two make quite the team, fighting off Prime’s clones together. “Not bad, Sparkles,” Catra compliments when she sees Glimmer effectively take down one.

Then the ship’s alarms blare and they don’t have much time. Catra leads Glimmer into the control room where she knows Prime can export anything out of the ship into space, even people. Making sure Glimmer is in the right spot, she gets to work.

“What are you doing?” Glimmer asks as Catra struggles with the controls.

“What does it look like, I’m getting you out of here.” She’s able to seal the doors so she can export Glimmer off this damn ship.

“Wait, are you saving me?” Glimmer asks.

“Not you, Adora.” Even as she says it, she knows Glimmer has changed her. But Adora is the one she wants to make happy. “Even if I sent her a message to stay away, she’d still come for you. That’s just how she is,” Catra explains.

 _Bam!_ Clones were now struggling to get into the control room and break-in. Not much time.

“What about you?” Glimmer asks, knowing Catra can’t export herself as well if she’s at the controls.

Catra considers that. “Me? All I do is hurt people.” Hadn’t Glimmer made that clear enough? “There’s no one left in the universe who cares about me.” _There could’ve been if I hadn’t screwed up with Adora_.

Finally, she’s able to get the audio transmission through to the Etherian First One’s ship.

“Adora?” she calls, hoping she’s heard.

“Catra?” a voice that’s unmistakably Adora’s replies. She sounds shocked. Gods, she hasn’t heard that voice in so long. And the last time she had heard her voice for real was when they were trying to kill each other. 

“Don’t sound so happy to hear me. I’m sending Glimmer to you.” She follows the ship’s location and punches in the numbers she needs to. “I don’t know your exact location, but I can get her to your quadrant. You _have_ to be there to catch her or she’ll die in space.”

“Wait, wait, wait what? Glimmer is with you? You’re on Prime’s ship too?”

The doors to the room open with a loud clang and the footfalls of many clones rushing to her now.

“We don’t have time!” Catra urges, “You need to get to these coordinates now. Don’t come here, no matter what. Horde Prime is ready for you!”

Quick to fight off the clones trying to get to her, she can barely hear Adora say. “Catra, I don’t understand. What is-”

Two of them finally grab her by the arms. “Just listen!” Catra yells. Her old words ring in her ears. _“I’ll never say sorry to anybody, ever!”_

She has to say it _now_. “Adora, I’m sorry- for everything!” It’s the first time she’s cried in a while, and it gives her the strength to push a clone away and finally hit the button to export Glimmer.

 _Good, she’s gone_ , Catra thinks as the clones get hold of her again.

The last thing she hears is Adora plead “No, no, no, no! Catra come back!” before the commutation is cut off by a clone.

As she's taken to the throne room, no doubt to Prime, she can’t help but think.

_Was- was Adora worried for me?_

* * *

When she’s inevitably brought before Prime, hands bound, he forces her to look at him by raising her chin up with his boot.

She is nothing now. It’s so much like the normal Horde. With _her_ gaze boring into her skin through that mask. _“Insolent child. You have never been anything more than a nuisance to me.”_

“The Etherian ship has changed course,” Prime tells her as she brought, hand bounds at the foot of his throne. He makes sure to “But your treachery will not save them. There is no darkness that my light cannot pierce; no distance that my hand cannot reach. They will not be able to hide from me forever!”

Catra tries to drown out the other clones chanting in the background. That’s what he thinks, but he doesn’t know this group he’s up against. She does.

“You were beloved in my sight and this is how you repay me,” Prime admits disappointedly.

_Huh, you hate me, oh benevolent leader? Get in line!_

"Well, what did you expect? After all, we Etherians are so _very_ emotional," Catra sneers, throwing his words back at him. She tells him he will not win, that Glimmer is gone. “And you will _never_ get your hands on Adora!” she spits out, the most important part of all.

Prime smiles in a way that makes her blood run cold. She knows what he can do to her. And yet, it doesn’t matter. She did what she had to do. One good thing before the end of her wretched existence.

* * *

After Adora and her friend finally save her days later, she’s barely conscious when they make a getaway. Being chipped by Prime and then thrown off an enormous height that she should have led to her death took its toll. She was only alive now because of She-Ra- Adora. Same difference.

There isn’t much she is able to pay attention to, but as being lifted up and placed on what feels like a mattress, she hears:

“I can’t thank you enough for helping me save her, Glimmer.” It’s Adora’s voice.

“I can’t believe I wanted you to,” she hears the other woman admit. “But she- let’s just say she surprised me.”

She feels someone come closer to her and whisper, “I guess apologies aren’t all that meaningless, huh, Horde scum?” and Adora and Glimmer leave the room.

Catra knows she can deal with whatever new fresh hell she’s gotten herself into with Adora and her merry band of idiots, but for now, she finally wants to sleep.

And she surprisingly finds she can sleep quite easily now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope if you've read this you enjoyed the little bits added to cannon and getting inside Catra's head.  
> I really want to write something about Catra's development with the BFS and Entrapata when they're all on Darla (they had to have all bonded more to be as comfortable as they became), but we'll see if that actually happens.

**Author's Note:**

> I should mention that a lot of my comprehension of She Ra's symbolism comes from the wonderful Youtube Channel Five by Five Takes. Their analysis of Catra as a character and particularly the episodes "Corridors" helped me better understand that episode.  
> Please take a look at these important analysis videoes if you get the chance:  
> https://youtu.be/PZNY2QcodGg.  
> https://youtu.be/arsKPegw1Tg.  
> https://youtu.be/Uev-yywlBug.


End file.
